Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Randomize
