I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
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