I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
