Nicole vs. Life
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Randomize
