my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize
