Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
