why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
