he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
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Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
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I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
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