Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
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