You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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