Whatcha textin bout Willis?
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
