Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
farters have to be the big spoon...
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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