So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
vagina is talking i cant
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Randomize
