Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
