the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
She's JV to your varsity
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
