Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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