I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
I just googled if crying burns calories
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
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