I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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