Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Randomize
