i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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