It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
