I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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