isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
