haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
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