Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
foreskin is a definite game changer
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
