glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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