He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
These 21 People Shouldn’t Be Giving Dating Advice
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I could fuck to npr.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
it's unicorns you uncultured swine