I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
