hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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