Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
