We're like a lot better than the average bears
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
