Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
from now on my penis is your penis
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
