What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
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