Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
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