it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
