omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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