You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize