the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
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