She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
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