Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
