they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
