All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize