I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Randomize
