Where is the hickey?
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Church boner. Awkwardddd
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
