I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
