i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
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