HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize