were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
