i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
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