So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
